1. DO NOT LUBE THE BALL JOINT STUD TAPERS where they go into the steering knuckle. The whole point of that taper is that it "stretches" the tapered hole in the steering knuckle for a TIGHT fit. If you lube the stud, you'll allow the stud to slide too far into the tapered hole, stretching it too far. The ball joint stud is not your peniis. Put the stud in the hole CLEAN AND DRY. Don't lube the stud threads, either.
2. The torque values for the ball joint stud nuts given in the service manual are MINIMUMS. When you get the ball joint stud poked into the steering knuckle holes, and the cotter-pin holes aligned in the direction you want 'em, (I go straight forward/backward so it's easy to get the cotter pin in...and back out later) you torque the nut to whatever the spec is. IF (big IF) you can get the cotter pin through the castellations in the nut and through the hole in the stud...great. Put the pin in and spread it. If the castellations and the hole don't line up, TIGHTEN the nut UP TO 1/6 TURN, but only far enough to get the alignment needed to shove the pin in.
3. DO NOT LOOSEN the nut in order to poke the cotter pin in place. If you somehow screw up, you have to pop the stud free and start over. Loosening the nut without popping the stud free can result in a broken stud or wobbled-out steering knuckle hole.