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Rent or buy a cooling system pressure tester and use it to check for leaks. If you lose system pressure but can't find any external leaks, it's a good possibility that there is a blown head gasket and/or cracked head. If you find that you have an internal leak, do not attempt to start the engine. Pull the spark plugs and the fuel pump and ignition fuses and spin the engine to clear any water in the cylinders. Look for evidence of water at the spark plug holes, number three especially. If it tests good, a compression check would be a good next step.
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Oh I never knew that, pardon my ignorance then.Basic diagnostics on the skip. Compression, fuel, and spark.
Compression will tell you a lot about the internal condition of the engine. No milky oil is not proof that the head gasket is good. It could be blown between cylinders, but a quick compression check can eliminate that possibility. As for not being comfortable with working on computer controlled engines, most of this stuff is strictly mechanical when you start talking about overheating issues.
Impeller blades on waterpump may also be toast. It may not be leaking and obviously bad, but it may not be circulating coolant as it should. I have one of those laser temp guns that is great for checking a lot of this stuff out. They aren't expensive and are very handy.